Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
My sister taught her 16-month-old that my name is thpt. Yep, thpt. Having a hard time pronouncing that name? Just stick your tongue out between your lips and blow. There.
I feel so honored.....
Monday, December 29, 2008
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Monday, December 22, 2008
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Friday, December 19, 2008
They're doing construction work at the bride's school, and all of the teachers have to park in a small field next to the school. Her van looks like she's been 4-wheeling. Mud on the doors and windows. We've had it washed twice in the past week. Doesn't do too much good.
I'm ready for these few days of dry weather heading our way, even it it does mean a few nights in the teens.....
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
You realize your wife was right - it's time to throw out these old boxers.....
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Monday, December 15, 2008
Friday, December 12, 2008
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
A woman being interviewed for jury duty on a murder case in Bronx (N.Y.) Supreme Court in October asked to be excused for the reason that she was once murdered, herself, by her husband (but had somehow been revived by a doctor). (She was dismissed from the jury, but on other grounds.)
Tuesday, December 09, 2008
Monday, December 08, 2008
Friday, December 05, 2008
Avoid arguments with the females about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.
For high blood pressure sufferers - simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure on your veins. Remember to use a timer.
A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. You’ll be afraid to cough.
You only need two tools in life - wd-40 and duct tape. If it doesn’t move and should, use the wd-40. If it shouldn’t move and does, use the duct tape.
If you can’t fix it with a hammer, you’ve got an electrical problem.
Thanks to Chris for today's post.....
Thursday, December 04, 2008
Any Christmas song by Celine Dion or Michael Bolton – Sorry if you’re a fan of either singer, but they both get on my nerves for different reasons. With Celine, it’s because I can’t stand to watch her perform. Any time I hear her voice, I picture her singing and I can’t turn the radio off fast enough. And I’d rather hear strange noises coming from a fat man in an adjacent men’s room stall than to have to listen to Michael Bolton sing anything.
People who brag about how much they’re spending on Christmas gifts – OK, I get it. You love your friends and family more than anyone else. You win.
Drivers that do 55 in a 70 whenever they see a state trooper that’s pulled over another driver – Come on, people. It’s not like you’re going to get extra credit for when you get caught speeding one day. I got stuck behind a lady who did this yesterday. Slowed down traffic like you wouldn't believe. May her stocking be filled with Michael Bolton CDs.
Corporate text messages – Somehow I got put on a list to receive a text messages that encourage me to visit T-Pain’s web site, his myspace page, and to buy his music. Joy.
Emails encouraging me to order special blue pills – I still think the bride put me on this distribution list. She says she didn’t, but she can be pretty sneaky at times……
Wednesday, December 03, 2008
We decided to buy her a digital picture frame. She doesn’t have a computer so we can’t send her the latest family pictures via email. We figured we’d get the frame and a couple of memory cards. Whenever we took new shots, we thought we’d load them onto a card and mail it to my parents. That way they could put the new card in for Mamaw and mail the old one back to us. Perfect gift.
So I got it out last night and loaded some pictures. Folks, there’s a reason why there are different prices on these digital frames. The more they cost, the better resolution on the screen. I bought what I thought was a mid-range frame. Some of the pictures made the people on screen look like they were missing teeth or an eye. Some looked like we had leprosy. I could actually draw better. After playing with it for about an hour, I decided to take it back. But there may be a problem with returning it.
I picked the frame up at Target during lunch on Monday. When I got back to the office I looked at the receipt. The cashier didn’t charge me for it. So how do you return something that you never paid for? Will they accuse me of shoplifting? Will they look at me like I’ve got three eyes when I tell them I never paid for the item I’m returning?
If you see my cell number show up on your phone, I could be calling for bail money…..
Tuesday, December 02, 2008
Monday, December 01, 2008
The food was great all week long. I've now decided it's easier to just buy bigger pants rather than starve myself.
Good to see the Vols win out. The scenes of Fulmer after the game were stirring. Now on to the Kiffin era of football.
I'm dying to post a picture of the bride giving me a look with which I'm very familiar. But I'll use better judgment and just show you one of the girls from the weekend in Johnson City.....
Monday, November 24, 2008
Friday, November 21, 2008
Ever notice that everything happens right before you plan to take a week off? It's been one of those weeks. I went to bed last night with so much on my mind, things I knew I had to get done before leaving. I woke up early, couldn't go back to sleep, and ended up coming in about 2 hours early. It wasn't all bad. The interstates were clear and light snow was falling. Looked great in the headlights.
I think I'll be ready for this vacation at the end of the day.....
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
The intro to the song begins at 28:40, and the song starts at about 29:18 when you click on the 11-16-08 video right here.....
Monday, November 17, 2008
Friday, November 14, 2008
Thursday, November 13, 2008
In September, despite an increasing chorus of complaints, Peruvians celebrated the annual Gastronomic Festival of the Cat in a village just south of Lima, serving a variety of feline delicacies (fried cat strips, cat stew, grilled cat with spicy huacatay). For the most part, according to a Chicago Tribune report, the dishes are made with specially bred cats rather than street prowlers, and are consumed for their health benefits, though centuries-old tradition is the likeliest explanation. Said one Peruvian, such cultural events "are our roots and can't be forgotten."
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Monday, November 10, 2008
Friday, November 07, 2008
Thursday, November 06, 2008
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
Monday, November 03, 2008
I listened to the press conference on my way home. I truly felt for Coach Fulmer. Here's a guy who invested a good portion of his life to the University of Tennessee. This isn't going to be an easy transition for him. He hinted that his coaching career may not be over, but it sure would seem odd to see him on another sidelines.
Do I think this is a good move? Absolutely. Do I wish Coach Fulmer had been able to win another national championship and then retire? Yeah, I do. But that wasn't going to happen anytime soon. The program needs new direction. Now Mike Hamilton has a huge task ahead of him. He needs to find the next "Bruce Pearl" for the football program.
Thanks for the great ride, Coach.....
Friday, October 31, 2008
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Exxon Mobil shatters own record for largest profit from operations by a US corporation
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Monday, October 27, 2008
Friday, October 24, 2008
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Monday, October 20, 2008
- I witnessed some air mattress surfing by Sara and her friends.
- I found out that the one thing the bride can't do without in life is some kind of Clinique makeup - not me. I won't lie to you, it hurt. But I'll get over it.
- The bride and I took Meg to vote Saturday. She was cheered on by the people working the polls when they learned she was a first-time voter.
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in AIG one year ago, you will have $33.00 today.
If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Lehman Brothers one year ago, you will have $0.00 today.
If you had purchased $1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned in the aluminum cans for recycling refund, you will have received a $214.00.
Based on the above, the best current investment plan is to drink heavily & recycle. It is called the 401-Keg.