Walking down a hallway in any business, you're sure to encounter all kinds of people. But what kind of reaction do you get? As a public service to my readers, I've compiled a list of creatures you might run into from time to time and how to handle them:
The Hugger - There's nothing wrong with these people. They just love everybody. Hug 'em right back. If you want them to stop, give them a pat on the bottom and wink as they break their embrace.
The Watchman/Berryman - He's the guy who is too busy. There aren't enough hours in the day. Just as you make eye contact, he's looking at his watch or Blackberry. Stop this person and ask him loudly if his wife's out of rehab yet.
The Big Mouth - This is the person who sees you from 1/4 mile down the hall and yells your name. This is fine on a college campus, but not in the corporate environment. Duck down the nearest stairwell and find an alternate route to your destination.
The Head-Turner - This person is too good to talk to you. Or anyone other than a superior to whom they want to suck up. They make eye contact and immediately look the other way. Stare them down until they feel uncomfortable, then ask if they put on a little weight over the holidays.
The Long-Talker - This is the person you want to avoid at all costs. You know, the one who thinks you mean it when you ask how they're doing? Just tell them how great they look as you pass them by, then take out your phone or Blackberry and stare it down like there's no tomorrow.